Showing posts with label Change. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Change. Show all posts

Sunday, June 8, 2014

Change or Die

It was Episcopal Bishop, John Shelby Spong who, years ago, said that "Christianity must change or die" in response to the question of where the Church fit into modern society and the issues of racism, poverty, women's equality, and homosexuality. Those words would prove to be prophetic as today the Church finds itself in a crisis. With atheism and alternative spirituality on the rise in the United States, the Church finds her pews increasingly vacant. Young people who identify as Millennials are leaving the Church in droves and the Pew Research Poll indicates that the reason is because of the Church's stand against homosexuality and the harsh treatment of gays and their gay friends.

Waking up to this reality has been difficult for the Church. While some of the most extreme fundamentalists are holding on to the Phelps-style "God Hates Fags" dogma, the more progressive sects and denominations are beginning to realize that what Spong warned of years ago, has come to pass and they now seem willing to at least talk about the issues. Some of the change seems to be happening simply because more and more young people are willing to come out to their parents as being gay, and fewer parents, fearing chastisement for being hateful, abusive, bigots on social media, are willing to disown their children when they come out. PFLAG, which is an organization of parents with gay children is reporting a sharp increase in membership, and it was only yesterday that I found a link on Facebook to an article about a Southern Baptist minister in California who has led his church to leave the Southern Baptist Convention because his congregation has decided to openly welcome members of the LGBT community. This decision was primarily due to the fact that the pastor's son had recently revealed to his father that he was gay. It seems the more gays that people know, the less likely they are to judge or be afraid of them. All of a sudden, gays become real people--friends, family members, neighbors-- and not some sub-human abstract abomination from the Old Testament.

Yesterday I attended the Tulsa Pride event with a dear friend and one of the booths I encountered was from the College Hill Presbyterian Church in Tulsa, Oklahoma. College Hill has been known as one of the most theologically and socially progressive churches in the entire state for decades and has been on the cutting edge of social issues such as racism, poverty, women's equality, and LGBT rights, throughout it's entire
history as a church. It was through my aunt, who is an elder there, that I first encountered the church and was taken in and sheltered by them after I divorced after 18 years of marriage and then partnered with a woman. Because of my family's and church's rejection, I had nowhere to turn for the support that I needed during a difficult and painful time in my life. The wonderful, loving, and caring people at College Hill embraced Steph and me and took us in as their own. In May of 2001, Steph and I were joined in Holy Union at the College Hill Presbyterian Church. We later removed our membership from there because the 60 mile drive there and back got to be too much to handle, but our hearts always remained with the people and our memories of their love and outreach to us will always be fond.

While watching the parade, I was also struck by the number of Tulsa churches of various denominations that were represented--Episcopal, Presbyterian, Unitarian, and even Methodist were all united in their love and support for the Tulsa LGBT community. Their voice was so loud that it served to drown out the hateful voice
of the crowd of anti-gay protesters carrying their ugly placards admonishing us to "REPENT" or face an eternity in hell. Apparently these Christians worship a different god than the one of the folks at College Hill.

Thursday, March 6, 2014

I Don't Want to Be in Your Play Anymore

People who know me know that I love the theater. I've been an actress since I was old enough to stand in front of the television and mimic the singers, dancers, and actresses who caught my fancy on all of the variety shows and movie musicals that were so popular in the 1960s. I was in my first live stage production at the age of nine and by the time I started high school, I'd been a part of so many plays and musical productions that I couldn't count them all. I love drama and I always have--on the stage, that is.

Unfortunately I also grew up with a lot of drama that wasn't always played out on the stage. It was Shakespeare who said that "All the world's a stage and all men and women merely players...", and he was correct. We all have to deal with a certain amount of offstage drama, but that doesn't mean that we have to create it nor must we be willing participants in the drama that someone else creates. The problem is that when we grow up in the drama, it's all we know. We don't realize that we don't have to live with it or that it's even harmful to us not only emotionally and mentally, but physically as well. We literally become addicted to it like a drug, which in fact, it is a drug, or at least it causes a chemical reaction in our bodies and gives us a rush like a drug. The natural hormone that it creates and feeds on is adrenalin, also known as the "fight or flight" hormone, and it's that chemical rush that causes our addiction to drama.

It wasn't until a few years ago after I had a major gallbladder attack and I had to have my very sick gallbladder removed, that I learned that stress and/or "drama" is a major contributor to gallbladder disease. It
was then that I made the decision that when the surgeon cut the diseased organ out, I was going to excise the drama from my life at the same time. I literally said "no" to all the people--family, friends, acquaintances, co-workers, people on Facebook, etc.-- who were addicted to drama and who not only created it, but who tried to suck me into it. Not only did I stop participating in other people's drama, I quit creating my own and sucking others in. At first it was hard. Like any addiction, you go through a period of withdrawal that literally leaves you feeling sick, empty, and bored, so to counteract the boredom and fill my life with something where the drama once was, I decided to write the book that I always wanted to write. After writing and publishing two books, I concentrated on losing the weight that the drama-induced stress caused. Pretty soon I found that not only did it get easier and easier to stay out of the drama, it also got easier to identify people who were addicted to drama and who were seeking to suck me into it. And once identified, it was easy for me to tell them that I didn't want to be a part of it and to go away.

Yes, I made a few enemies when I walked off their stages in the middle of a scene, but I actually found a whole lot more friends in the process--friends whose plays are much more fun to be in and who enjoy taking the stage and then standing back and giving the stage to me for a while. If life must be a theater, at least I have a choice of whose play I want to be in.

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Has it really been over two years since I darkened this place?

It has been a while, I know, but life has a way of moving on and moving in so quickly that it's often difficult to keep up with all the things you were so dedicated to before. Such is the case for me. Since my last post, I've had emergency surgery (my poor gallbladder decided to give up the ghost), written and published my second novel, started my own publishing company with my partner, Steph, visited my oldest daughter in France, saw her graduate Phi Beta Kappa from college, sent my son off to the army, been diagnosed with borderline diabetes, and lost nearly 100 pounds. I've packed a lot of living into the last two years, and as packed with accomplishments as they have been, the greatest accomplishment has been my weight loss.

Today I made a video that traces my weight loss journey. How did I do it? I used common sense and started eating the way nature intended human beings to eat--cut out refined and processed sugars, cut out processed foods, and went back to natural, healthy, whole foods and plenty of low impact exercise. No gimmicks, no special diets, no pills, no surgery, and no expensive gym memberships. Watch the video and see my results. I'm pretty proud of me.


Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Here's to new beginnings


It's not perfect, but it's a good start. Thank you, President Obama, for your steadfast commitment to the American People. 

AP Photo/J. Scott Applewhit

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

On meddling in other people's lives



Some of life's lessons are the hardest lessons. For whatever reason, I messed up and it has cost me a lifelong friendship. I must now confess that it was my need to fix my friend's life that contributed to this end, and I truly regret that.

I'm reminded of Jane Austen's Emma. I have never really liked that story, and even after reading the book and seeing the film several times, the character of Emma always irked me, and made me angry. Now I know why, for when I looked at Emma, I was seeing a reflection of myself and I didn't like what I saw. (I feel that it is no coincidence that I watched the film, yet again, with my daughter, Lauren, this weekend.)  So now that I've seen my ugly face starring back at me through Emma's mirror, I must take action and do something to fix myself, for a change.

I found a website that addresses the need to fix and found some helpful information. (I'm posting the link HERE just in case some other "chronic fixers" might be interested in seeing it.) Here are some of the things that stood out for me.

My need to fix is driven by the following:

1. Compulsively driven behavior to rescue or help another person, place or thing to be the way you believe it "should be.''
2. Inability to accept people, places or things the way they are and the chronic attempt at changing them even if they are unchangeable.
3. Drive to feel "needed'' or "wanted'' which leads you to become overly involved and responsible in your relationships with persons, places and things.
4. Result of a pattern of getting approval and recognition from others for "helping'' in the past with the belief that this is the only way you can have meaning in life.

 The negative effects of my need to fix are:

1. Run the risk of becoming a caretaker to many with few people giving you the healthy emotional support you need to be a fully functioning and coping human.
2. Experience people moving away from you if they no longer desire "to be fixed'' by your advice, solutions or insights.
 3. Will hand out a lot of "I owe yous'' to those you fix in hope they will be there for you when you need them, unfortunately forgetting that your only worth to them has been the fixing you perform and they will not "come through'' the way you hope they will in your time of need.
4. Might be the one who does all the work in a relationship and, once you "stop the work,'' the relationship will die since you are no longer working at fixing it.
 5. Might have successfully used everyone else's problems to divert your attention from yourself, the only one you have greatest odds of fixing because you can have control and change yourself best.

I'm going to spend a lot of time in deep introspection in order to address this problem. I'm also going to seek to cultivate friendships with persons who are less needy and who will be more available to support me in my own personal growth and character.  I also need to find the balance between compassion and meddling and learn the difference between the two. But most of all, I'm going to work on that pesky little guy named "ego", and put him back in his proper place. 

Thankfully Emma had many redeeming qualities - loyalty, compassion, generosity - to name a few, so in the end, it turned out well for her, for she was able to see the err of her ways and cultivate those qualities that made people fall in love with her in the first place. I will do the same, and only hope that one day my old friend can find it in his heart to forgive me.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Equality's Day in Court


Today was the opening day of the challenge to Proposition 8 in a California Federal Court. Attorney for the plantiffs, Ted Olson, gave his opening statement, challenging the constitutionality of Proposition 8, which took away the rights of California LGBT's to marriage.



OPENING STATEMENT

(as prepared)

This case is about marriage and equality. Plaintiffs are being denied both the right to marry, and the right to equality under the law.

The Supreme Court of the United States has repeatedly described the right to marriage as “one of the vital personal rights essential to the orderly pursuit of happiness by free men;” a “basic civil right;” a component of the constitutional rights to liberty, privacy, association, and intimate choice; an expression of emotional support and public commitment; the exercise of spiritual unity; and a fulfillment of one’s self.

In short, in the words of the highest court in the land, marriage is “the most important relation in life,” and “of fundamental importance for all individuals.”

As the witnesses in this case will elaborate, marriage is central to life in America. It promotes mental, physical and emotional health and the economic strength and stability of those who enter into a marital union. It is the building block of family, neighborhood and community. The California Supreme Court has declared that the right to marry is of “central importance to an individual’s opportunity to live a happy, meaningful, and satisfying life as a full member of society.”

Proposition 8 ended the dream of marriage, the most important relation in life, for the plaintiffs and hundreds of thousands of Californians.


In May of 2008, the California Supreme Court concluded that under this State’s Constitution, the right to marry a person of one’s choice extended to all individuals, regardless of sexual orientation, and was available equally to same-sex and opposite-sex couples.

In November of 2008, the voters of California responded to that decision with Proposition 8, amending the State’s Constitution and, on the basis of sexual orientation and sex, slammed the door to marriage to gay and lesbian citizens.

The plaintiffs are two loving couples, American citizens, entitled to equality and due process under our Constitution. They are in deeply committed, intimate, and longstanding relationships. They want to marry the person they love; to enter into that “most important relation in life”; to share their dreams with their partners; and to confer the many benefits of marriage on their families.

But Proposition 8 singled out gay men and lesbians as a class, swept away their right to marry, pronounced them unequal, and declared their relationships inferior and less-deserving of respect and dignity.

In the words of the California Supreme Court, eliminating the right of individuals to marry a same-sex partner relegated those individuals to “second class” citizenship, and told them, their families and their neighbors that their love and desire for a sanctioned marital partnership was not worthy of recognition.

During this trial, Plaintiffs and leading experts in the fields of history, psychology, economics and political science will prove three fundamental points:

First – Marriage is vitally important in American society.

Second – By denying gay men and lesbians the right to marry, Proposition 8 works a grievous harm on the plaintiffs and other gay men and lesbians throughout California, and adds yet another chapter to the long history of discrimination they have suffered.

Third – Proposition 8 perpetrates this irreparable, immeasurable, discriminatory harm for no good reason.



I  MARRIAGE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT RELATION IN LIFE

Plaintiffs will present evidence from leading experts, representing some of the finest academic institutions in this country and the world, who will reinforce what the highest courts of California and the United States have already repeatedly said about the importance of marriage in society and the significant benefits that marriage confers on couples, their families, and the community. Proponents cannot dispute these basic facts.

While marriage has been a revered and important institution throughout the history of this country and this State, it has also evolved to shed irrational, unwarranted, and discriminatory restrictions and limitations that reflected the biases, prejudices or stereotypes of the past. Marriage laws that disadvantaged women or people of disfavored race or ethnicity have been eliminated. These changes have come from legislatures and the courts. Far from harming the institution of marriage, the elimination of discriminatory restrictions on marriage has strengthened the institution, its vitality, and its importance in American society today.


II PROPOSITION 8 HARMS GAY AND LESBIAN INDIVIDUALS, THEIR CHILDREN AND THEIR COMMUNITIES

Proposition 8 had a simple, straightforward, and devastating purpose: to withdraw from gay and lesbian people like the Plaintiffs their previously recognized constitutional right to marry. The official title of the ballot measure said it all: “Eliminates Right of Same-Sex Couples to Marry.”

Proponents of Proposition 8 have insisted that the persons they would foreclose from the institution of marriage have suffered no harm because they have been given the opportunity to form something called a “domestic partnership.” That is a cruel fiction.

Plaintiffs will describe the harm that they suffer every day because they are prevented from marrying. And they will describe how demeaning and insulting it can be to be told that they remain free to marry—as long, that is, that they marry someone of the opposite sex instead of the person they love, the companion of their choice.

And the evidence will demonstrate that relegating gay men and lesbians to “domestic partnerships” is to inflict upon them badges of inferiority that forever stigmatize their loving relationships as different, separate, unequal, and less worthy—something akin to a commercial venture, not a loving union. Indeed, the proponents of Proposition 8 acknowledge that domestic partnerships are not the same as traditional marriage. Proponents proudly proclaim that, under Proposition 8, the “unique and highly favorable imprimatur” of marriage is reserved to “opposite-sex unions.”

This government-sponsored societal stigmatization causes grave psychological and physical harms to gay men and lesbians and their families. It increases the likelihood that they will experience discrimination and harassment; it causes immeasurable harm.

Sadly, Proposition 8 is only the most recent chapter in our nation’s long and painful history of discrimination and prejudice against gay and lesbian individuals. They have been classified as degenerates, targeted by police, harassed in the workplace, censored, demonized, fired from government jobs, excluded from our armed forces, arrested for their private sexual conduct, and repeatedly stripped of their fundamental rights by popular vote. Although progress has occurred, the roots of discrimination run deep and its impacts spread wide.


III  PROPOSITION 8 HARMS GAY AND LESBIAN INDIVIDUALS FOR NO GOOD REASON

Proposition 8 singles out gay and lesbian individuals alone for exclusion from the institution of marriage. In California, even convicted murderers and child abusers enjoy the freedom to marry. As the evidence clearly establishes, this discrimination has been placed in California’s Constitution even though its victims are, and always have been, fully contributing members of our society. And it excludes gay men and lesbians from the institution of marriage even though the characteristic for which they are targeted—their sexual orientation—like race, sex, and ethnicity, is a fundamental aspect of their identity that they did not choose for themselves and, as the California Supreme Court has found, is highly resistant to change.

The State of California has offered no justification for its decision to eliminate the fundamental right to marry for a segment of its citizens. And its chief legal officer, the Attorney General, admits that none exists. And the evidence will show that each of the rationalizations for Proposition 8 invented by its Proponents is wholly without merit.

“Procreation” cannot be a justification inasmuch as Proposition 8 permits marriage by persons who are unable or have no intention of producing children. Indeed, the institution of civil marriage in this country has never been tied to the procreative capacity of those seeking to marry.

Proposition 8 has no rational relation to the parenting of children because same-sex couples and opposite sex couples are equally permitted to have and raise children in California. The evidence in this case will demonstrate that gay and lesbian individuals are every bit as capable of being loving, caring and effective parents as heterosexuals. The quality of a parent is not measured by gender but the content of the heart.

And, as for protecting “traditional marriage,” our opponents “don’t know” how permitting gay and lesbian couples to marry would harm the marriages of opposite-sex couples. Needless to say, guesswork and speculation is not an adequate justification for discrimination. In fact, the evidence will demonstrate affirmatively that permitting loving, deeply committed, couples like the plaintiffs to marry has no impact whatsoever upon the marital relationships of others.

When voters in California were urged to enact Proposition 8, they were encouraged to believe that unless Proposition 8 were enacted, anti-gay religious institutions would be closed, gay activists would overwhelm the will of the heterosexual majority, and that children would be taught that it was “acceptable” for gay men and lesbians to marry. Parents were urged to “protect our children” from that presumably pernicious viewpoint.

At the end of the day, whatever the motives of its Proponents, Proposition 8 enacted an utterly irrational regime to govern entitlement to the fundamental right to marry, consisting now of at least four separate and distinct classes of citizens: (1) heterosexuals, including convicted criminals, substance abusers and sex offenders, who are permitted to marry; (2) 18,000 same-sex couples married between June and November of 2008, who are allowed to remain married but may not remarry if they divorce or are widowed; (3) thousands of same-sex couples who were married in certain other states prior to November of 2008, whose marriages are now valid and recognized in California; and, finally (4) all other same-sex couples in California who, like the Plaintiffs, are prohibited from marrying by Proposition 8.

There is no rational justification for this unique pattern of discrimination. Proposition 8, and the irrational pattern of California’s regulation of marriage which it promulgates, advances no legitimate state interest. All it does is label gay and lesbian persons as different, inferior, unequal, and disfavored. And it brands their relationships as not the same, and less-approved than those enjoyed by opposite sex couples. It stigmatizes gays and lesbians, classifies them as outcasts, and causes needless pain, isolation and humiliation.

It is unconstitutional.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

On living in the past

 


 

 History is a relentless master. It has no present, only the past rushing into the future. To try to hold fast is to be swept aside. -- John Fitzgerald Kennedy

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

The Eight of Cups: Severing links with the past




A turning point, a severing of links with the past, which have become outdated. A turning away from established relationships and objects of affection, to facilitate progress to newer and deeper things.



Although I know that the changes that are going on in my life right now are only clearing the way for newer and better things, I can't help but feel some saddness for what I leave behind. Along with this move, my last "chick" is leaving the nest. Last night, as Heather and I sat on her bed and watched America's Got Talent together, I began to tear up at the reality of my soon-to-be empty nest. I didn't think I would go through empty nest syndrome like this, but I think that with the upheaval of the move and the financial stress it is bringing, along with the fact that I'm right in the big fat middle of menopause, it's all a bit overwhelming right now.


I'm entering a new phase of life, now. It's hard not to look back and grieve over what may have been wasted or lost, but at the same time, I know that regret only keeps me from seeing the opportunities that are before me. So, as in the picture on the eight of cups, I turn away from the past, and begin my journey into the future, which I know to be full of tremendous promise.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

A long list of to-do's



Last week we signed the lease on our new house and this week we've gotten into it to find that there is much work to be done before it is move-in ready. Steph started Friday evening with the pulling of nails and spackling, prepping the walls for new paint. The spackling is nearly finished, but we still have a long list of "to-dos" before we start painting. Yesterday I went through and inventoried everything that was wrong with the place. Our landlord gave us a paper with 10 spaces on it to list everything that was wrong. I filled out all ten lines and added two more. Everything from the place not being cleaned at all, to mold on the windowsills and screens, to doors that are off their hinges and/or won't latch, to badly stained toilets and tubs, and a garbage disposal that isn't operating. We're going to fix all the things that we can fix and do all the necessary cleaning, but then we're going to hand them the list and tell them that in light of the fact that we've done all the cleaning and fixing of the place, (with the exception of the garbage disposal), we don't feel that we should have to pay a cleaning deposit. The only thing left that I wish we could do is pull up that dark green carpeting and reveal the wood floors. I know they would probably require extensive restoration. Ah, well! Perhaps soon we'll be in the position to buy the house and we'll be able to do it then.

We'll be back at it again today!

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Operation Clean Sweep


Over the last several weeks I have been confronted with some attitudes, beliefs, and ideas that have crept into my life over the years that I realize have not been serving me well and need to be swept from my life before I can be open and receptive to the wonderful things that the universe has waiting for me. As I've been meditating they're being revealed to me one by one, so that I may confront them and clean them from my life.

1. Unworthiness - I've been taught to believe through religion, society, and the system that unless I play by their rules and believe the "right" things, do the "right" things, and live my life according to their dictates, dogmas, and doctrines that I am unworthy of prosperity and success. That is a lie from the pits of hell, and I will no longer buy into it.

2. Fear - As Steph has so beautifully put it: The opposite of love is not hate, it is fear. Am I operating out of love or fear? Today, and every day I will choose to operate out of love.

3. Naivete - Deficient in worldly wisdom or informed judgment. I was raised in a rather mysogenistic environment under the idea that women were to be protected and sheltered from the world by their husbands. After I was divorced I wasn't prepared to meet the world around me and live in it on my own, therefore I have been rather naieve about life and the difficulties that it can and does present. I am a kind and loving spirit, and I have operated under the illusion that everyone else is the same. I've had to learn the hard way that this simply isn't so, that there are people around every corner who will pretend to be your friend and then turn around and stab you in the back. I must remain as innocent as a dove and sly as a fox.

4. Greed - This one was really a hard one for me, for I don't want to admit that I have slipped into its icy grip. But here I am. It's really easy to do in our society. You're told by the media and everyone around you that you're just not worthy or successful if you can't keep up with the latest trends in fashion, technology, homes, cars, etc. Living with financial struggle for the last ten years has taught me some valuable lessons about what is necessary and what is not. I have learned that the love of famiy and friends far exceeds anything else to which I could aspire, and that all the "toys" that are deemed necessary simply are not. I will learn to be frugal, yet generous, and I will display gratitude for everything that I have been given.

There are probably others, but these four seem to be the ones that have risen to the top and for now, are the ones that need my most immediate attention. So here I am with a broom and a dustpan ready to clean them out, so that my channels will be open and receptive for all the wonderful bounty that the universe has in store for me!

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Just Yuk!


I've awakened this morning to swollen, achy, joints, (everything is swollen for that matter), achy hands and feet, asthma lurking around the corner, waiting to pounce at the slightest provocation, and a nagging headache.


But I'm in good spirits--at least I can be thankful for that! Does anyone have any chocolate?

Monday, March 30, 2009

Growing through change


Today, help me God, to let go of my resistance to change. Help me to be open to the process. Help me believe that the place I will be dropped off will be better than the place I was picked up. Help me to surrender, trust and accept. even if I don't understand. ~ Melody Beattie

Friday, March 27, 2009

A cynical view of womanhood


From John Gay's The Beggar's Opera, 1765:


Virgins are like the fair Flower in its Lustre,
Which in the Garden enamels the Ground;
Near it the Bees in play flutter and cluster,
And gaudy Butterflies frolick around.
But, when once pluck'd, 'tis no longer alluring,
To Covent-Garden 'tis sent (as yet sweet),
There fades, and shrinks, and grows past all enduring
Rots, stinks, and dies, and is trod under feet.

Monday, March 9, 2009

I hate time changes


It's nearly six in the morning, but my body thinks it's only five. I don't understand why we continue this useless and archaic ritual known as "daylight savings time". When I was a mother with little children I hated it even more. It threw my babies completely off schedule for weeks, making them tired, grumpy, and out of sorts until their little clocks could adjust.

Grrr...I want to go back to bed!

Friday, January 30, 2009

Freedom to move forward


Today I look within to release myself from the affect that others have upon me. I acknowledge my feelings and thoughts that hold me captive and release them. I boldly speak my word for truth and freedom and move forward in my life.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Hope


I have no choice but to believe this vision. As the child of a black man and white woman, born in the melting pot of Hawaii, with a sister who is half-Indonesian, but who is usually mistaken for Mexican, and a brother-in-law and niece of Chinese descent, with some relatives who resemble Margaret Thatcher and others who could pass for Bernie Mac, I never had the option of restricting my loyalties on the basis of race or measuring my worth on the basis of tribe. ~The Audacity of Hope, by Barack Obama

Friday, January 2, 2009

Honor your soul


If your spirit is not present where you are, and you feel intuitively called elsewhere, you must hearken to your inner voice. I am not encouraging you to be irresponsible and run away from things you need to do. I am encouraging you to be responsive to your spirit. It is not responsible to engage in activities that affront your soul. Honor your soul by being where you belong.

~ Alan Cohen

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Judgement: Letting go of the past


Basic Card Symbols

Angel, trumpets, graves with people rising from them, often water or an ocean.

Basic Tarot Story

As the Fool leaves the garden of the Sun, he feels that he is near the end of his journey, ready to take a final step. But something is keeping him from doing this, holding him back. He gazes up, hoping to find guidance from the Sun; instead he sees above him a fiery angel, beautiful and terrible.

"You are right," the Angelic figure confirms, "you have only one last step on your journey, one final step to completion. But you cannot take that step until you lay your past to rest." The Fool is perturbed. "Lay it to rest? I thought I'd left it behind, all of it," he says. "There is no way to do that," The Angel observes. "Each step wears down the shoe just a bit, and so shapes the next step you take, and the next and the next. Your past is always under your feet. You cannot hide from it, run from it, or rid yourself of it. But you can call it up, and come to terms with it. Are you willing to do that?"

The Angel hands the Fool a small trumpet. The Fool is hesitant, but he knows that this is a final decision. Either to go forward, or stay where he is. He blows, and the trumpet's song echoes across the sky, its vibrations seeming to crack open the Earth. From under the Fool's feet, memories rise. Images of his innocent youth, challenges, loves, failures, losses, success, disillusionment and wisdom.

For the first time, he does not try to leave them, ignore or forget them, but accepts them. They are, he sees, nothing to fear. They happened, but they are gone now. He, alone, carries them into the present. With that understanding, the memories vanish. Though they remain in his mind, they no longer have any power over him. He is free of them, reborn, and wholly in the present.

Basic Tarot Meaning

With Fire as its ruling element (or Pluto as its ruling planet), Judgement is about rebirth, resurrection. The idea of Judgement day is that the dead rise, their sins are forgiven, and they move onto heaven. The Judgement card is similar, it asks for the resurrection to summon the past, forgive it, and let it go. There are wounds from the past that we never let heal, sins we've committed that we refuse to forgive, bad habits we haven't the courage to lose. Judgement advises us to finally face these, recognize that the past is past, and put them to rest, absolutely and irrevocably. This is also a card of healing, quite literally from an accident or illness, as well as a card signaling great transformation, renewal, change.



Judgement is often a hard card to read; it usually signals just a big change, one that involves leaving something old completely behind and stepping into something completely new. Like closing the door on an old job, and opening the door to a new and very different career. But it's also about making a final decision, to take that plunge into the new career, to forgive your family, to leave an abusive spouse, to make a new life. To heal and renew. It's a very hard card to read, in part because it deals with very hard and final decisions. And it means facing something that most Querents don't want to face. You can't hide any longer, this card says, all the dead have risen and are out in the open. Face what you have to face; make that decision. Change.

From Aeclectic Tarot